Good Evening

Hello everyone,

I seem to be having an enjoyable evening for a change. I worked late today and was tired when I got home, so I took a nap and slept for an hour! I guess I needed it, as long as it doesn't keep me awake tonight...but I know it will.

Before I went to work this morning I clean my place up, so when I woke tonight it was so nice to see it clean and tidy. No my place is not messy, but there is something about a freshly cleaned place that is calming.

Maybe I find it calming also because when I came into my computer I saw a couple of deer out grazing. Moments before this I was watching the moon make her journey into the night and pass my window. The moon seems to be about half full, or half empty, and this is what I was contemplating.

Of course then if you know me even a little, you know I started comparing this state of the moon to my life. Being half full I am content here tonight just drinking coffee and thinking, being half empty, I thought how nice it would be to have someone to talk too about these things.

I have met very few people who would be comfortable talking about this subject. I seemed to think different than most people. Kelly is the exception to the rule, and enjoys these conversations with me, thank god for her. But I am talking about a companion of the opposite sex.

My X always told me I was crazy to have thoughts like that, and when I was younger I was afraid to put my thoughts into words. Now I really don't care what those people think, because that just means we have nothing at all in common. I tend to want to think outside of the box, and want different conversations, rather than the regular stuff.

I guess they call this wishful thinking, but at least they are good healthy thoughts now, compared to all the turmoil I was experiencing. One day I do hope to find a man who is capable of not only having these kinds of conversations, but who actually understands them...now I didn't say how old I would be...or if I would live that long! But there is always a dream, and I want to keep dreaming good thoughts.

I decided to write a poem to try and describe this thought.

Fulfilled

Am I half empty, or am I half full,

Am I really content now, or is my mind playing me a fool.

To speak ones mind with someone to listen,

this would lead to real emotion, and life's true mission.

First be content with yourself and not another,

inner peace will then join us, and bring us together.

Once this magic equation is reached,

heaven and earth will be at our feet.

Spend your time and keep deep in thought,

if we find happiness, the misery will be lost.

But keep it straight and keep it true,

and contentment might just find, me and you.

.............................................................................................................

I hope you understand and find a little enjoyment in this thought process, and if I ever find this magic equation, or man I will let you know. But I won't be holding my breath on that one!

Keep life simple when possible,

Pixie:)